21 Ways to Cultivate Social Wellness
In the Exploring Social Wellness post, we learned how our connection to those around us contributes to our overall health and well-being, but making time to cultivate Social Wellness can be a challenge.
In this post, we’ll explore 21 ways to cultivate Social Wellness when you’re a busy mom.
Have Quality Conversations
1. Be Present
The first and most important way to cultivate social wellness is to be present. Spend time with loved ones in a mindful way — not alone in the same room.
Put your phone down, make eye contact, and actively engage with people.
2. Be A Better Listener
Actively listen to what someone is saying without judgement and without assuming you know what they mean. Really listen and hear what they are saying.
Wait until someone has finished to consider your response. How often do spend your time “listening” to someone by forming your response while they are still talking?
3. Stop Hijacking the Conversation
We are all guilty of this from time to time. Imagine your friend is opening-up about something she’s dealing with and before she’s even finished talking you jump in with “That happened to me too! This is what I did…”
The conversation is no longer about her, but about you.
Perhaps you think you’re helping her out and sharing your hard-earned wisdom, but unless she asks you, keep your story to yourself and LISTEN to your friend.
4. Reflect And Summarize
Show the person speaking to you that you hear what they are saying by
- Restating something they said, or
- Extracting the deeper meaning, and
- Pulling together the relevant information into a single statement.
5. Ask Open Ended Questions
Be curious. Stop assuming you know what someone is trying to say or assuming you know where they are going with their conversation.
Questions that start with “How” or “What” give the speaker an opportunity to give information instead of just giving a simple, “closed” response like “yes” or “no”. For example
- Open-ended question – “How do you feel about ___________________?”
- Closed-ended question – “Are you upset about ____________________?”
6. Be Mindful of Nonverbal Cues
What does your body language say or tone of voice? What about the face you are making or the language you use?
All of these types of communication can enhance or detract from your intended message and can lead to major miscommunication.
Be A Better Friend
7. Learn to Empathize
Feeling bad for someone is to feel sympathy for that person. Feeling empathy is to put yourself in their shoes and feel what they are feeling.
8. Allow Your Friend to Feel Their Feelings
We often feel uncomfortable when others are upset because we don’t know how to comfort them, so we try to hurry them out of their feelings.
This attempt at comfort actually feels more like dismissing or minimizing what someone is feeling. It can make the person feel misunderstood or isolated.
Sometimes, all you can say is “That sucks. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’m here for you in whatever way you need.”
Save your pep talks for another time.
9. Be More Compassionate
Compassion is not only reserved for people you like, but also for the person who cut you off in traffic this morning.
You never know what someone else is dealing with. Instead of responding with anger and resentment, pause and consider that they might have been distracted by strong emotions, or running late for work, or maybe they just made a mistake.
Or maybe they were just being inconsiderate, but you don’t have to let it ruin your day and it’s certainly not an excuse to take your frustration out on someone else.
10. Let Go Of Competition and Power Struggles
Remember that we are all individuals with different values and priorities.
You can accept and love who you are without having to be validated by another person.
11. Accept Others Where They Are
None of us are perfect and the only person you have control over is yourself. Let others find their own way in their own time.
This can be so frustrating, especially when you have done a lot of personal development, but again, you can only be responsible for yourself.
Rise To The Challenge
12. Own Your Actions
Many people believe that personal accountability is lacking in our world right now. We want to blame everyone else for what’s wrong in our lives and don’t want to take any responsibility.
There are so many things out of our control, but we always have the power of choice. You may not like the choices you have or they may be incredibly difficult, but you always have a choice to act or not.
Take responsibility for your choices and your actions.
13. Learn To Forgive
Nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes, but forgiveness is less about the other person and more about you.
When you hang on to negative thoughts and feelings, they prevent you from being able to move forward.
Some things and people are easier to forgive than others, and it will often take a long time, but putting yourself on the path to forgiveness is a big step toward wellness.
14. Learn To Let Go
People and relationships come and go throughout our lives. Hold on to the ones that are important to you, but be OK letting go of the ones that have run their course or are detrimental to your well-being.
This doesn’t mean you have to “cut” someone out of your life in a negative way — unless that’s absolutely necessary — but an emotional letting go of the affect this person has on you.
Reach Out
15. Get In Touch
Message someone that you’ve lost touch with. Maybe this is someone from your past or someone you just haven’t seen in a while.
Relationships will perish unless you make an effort to keep them going. Do not wait for the other person to make a move. Take that step today!
16. Have Child-Free Conversations
Give yourself (and your friends) a break from talking about your children. Especially, those friends who do not have children.
By the way — can we please stop asking other women/couples when they are having kids and/or if they want children? It’s such a private decision and one that may be sensitive.
Ok — just had to get that out there!
Remember that you are more than a great mother — you are strong, independent woman with a variety of interests.
17. Get Out Of The House
If you stay at home or work from home, you may feel disconnected or isolated from other people. Find ways to get out of the house.
Try to meet up with a friend or family member if possible, or simply find a public place where you can be around other people to help you feel connected to the human race again.
Don’t be afraid to strike up a conversation with a stranger!
Make Connections
18. Find Your Tribe
We benefit from connecting with lots of different types of people so we can learn and grow. We also benefit from connecting with people who share the same interests and values that we do.
This helps us to feel like we are part of a community. Especially, if your interests are more unique than mainstream.
19. Find A Mom Group
Being a mom is hard and sometimes the only people who can understand what you’re going through are other moms.
Find women in similar situations who can empathize and validate your feelings. You can lean on and support each other.
20. Use Social Media Wisely
Social media can be a great tool to connect with family and friends who are located all over the world. It’s also a great way to connect you with people who share the same likes, hobbies, values, etc.
Social media and virtual communication is a great way to enhance our social wellness, but do not let it replace face to face relationships.
Social skills need to be practiced or you may forget to how to appropriately interact with other people.
21. Choose Quality Over Quantity
It’s not about the amount of “friends” you have, or followers, connections, subscribers, etc. It’s about the quality of your real and authentic relationships.
You’re a busy mom, but making time to cultivate Social Wellness will help you feel much less isolated and more connected to the world around you.
Cherish special moments with friends and family and make nourishing those relationships a high priority.
How do you cultivate Social Wellness? Share your experience in the comments below!
For more on improving your Social Wellness, check out this week’s YouTube video Cultivating Social Wellness:
Educational Purposes Only.
This website is created for educational purposes only and does not provide any professional advice of any kind. Professional advice can only be given with a full understanding of a client’s unique personal situation, and typically can only be given with a license.
Accordingly, any recommendations, advice, or information provided on this website should be viewed within the context of general information and education. If you require additional advice or guidance, we recommend you seek out the assistance of a professional in your local area.
